Messed up inside

2nd trial almost over...thank goodness. Bored to death cause Vero, E Xuan , Nasuha and the lot are not with me in class...is yelling a crime? I exploded 2 days ago...scared everyone cause I was quite quiet and plus I didn't yell at others for almost a year now. Those who were in 1H with me know my other side-volcano-but those that were in 2B, did I scare you guys?

Bored

I can't go anywhere lately because of some rather paranoid adults going " H1N1 is so serious lately, don't go out." Oh I am so bored at home! And then the school decides to have a 2nd trial exam. I think they are trying to stress us teens out...

Tears for a classic

I have never felt or done something like that before. I cried over a book. Some of you might think that it is stupid but to me that book is like a treasured posession and it hurts to know that it is now beyond repair. I had been searching for ages for it and I really liked that author so imagine my pain when it is no longer readable.

Cousin's wedding pics

Picture of the whole family

Front row: Erwin, Kah Poh, Shirley, me, Michelle, Jacin, Abby and Nikki, my lil sis

Middle row: Shirley's mum and dad aka my 2nd uncle and aunt, my grandma, the groom's parents aka my eldest uncle and aunt

Back row: The groom's olde brother and his daughter, Stella, my fifth uncle, my dad, my mum, the bride, the groom, my fourth uncle and aunt andI dunno how to call those other 2

My eldest cousin sister, Michelle and the bride

My fifth uncle-he got the largest bowl of all

My mum and dad-ain't my dad quite bald?

My 2nd aunt and her pressie

My uncle 4 and my aunt with their pressie

The prankster's tea is so full to the brim-the mother in law is being cut into half! Oh my gosh.

My mum's pressie-in the background: finally, me! right at the bride's neck

The bride and my cousin-kissu

My 2nd uncle and aunt at the tea ceremony-

My cousin, Kah Poh opening the door for the couple

The 'propose' scene-she has to accept the flowers first

My cousin the groom

Friends

I am seriously missing my friends now. Especially Audrey and Esther, those two I really miss the most. One of them is my best friend and the other is probably one of the most amazing friends I have ever made. It has been almost two and a half years since I last saw them or even heard their voices. I really do hope our friendship will last.

I also miss my wacky BC mates- Christie, Tiffany, Rui Jing, Mei Si, Li Fei and Jun Xu. I was supposed to attend class with Christie and Tiffany but I played truant for two weeks and adding with the one week break we have, it has been three weeks since I last laughed at the wacky nonsense and remarks they make. That is the only time I ever get to act as crazy as I want to around 'wacko' friends. They are among the best mates I have-the ones that see the nutty side of me that I have always kept hidden and accepted it as who I am. Fortunately, I will be back with them in two days.

I love all my friends. To a loner like me, they are what keeps me going and guide me through my life. Therefore, all my friends are important and fabulous.

Congratulations 2 a newly wed couple

CONGRATULATIONS

TO

NG KAH CHOON

&

TAN HUI YEE

4TH JULY 2009

Bukit Tinggi Pics

Me on horseback.

My sister on horseback.

My sister and I with a rabbit my dad caught.

Me and a rabbit. It feels quite good holding it.

Equestrian Dream

Oh daddy, don't be so mean! Let me let me go!!! I won't just drop out after a few lessons. So please? Please, please, please!

Equestrian is gonna take lots of my time but I've been dreaming bout it since I was 10 years old! Now that my dream is so close, I am not gonna just let it go because my dad is EXTREMLY tight with the dollar signs. I am gonna nag and nag until he gives in. Haha, am I a bad girl?-thinks for a while-Nah, don't think so. I am just gonna make him stick to his word, that's all.

Bukit Tinggi Vacation

I am back from Bukit Tinggi! I had so much fun there. Okay, it was only a 1 day trip since my dad was too stingy to pay for the hotel fee. We visited the Japanese Village and saw some Japanese houses. I wanted to try wearing the kimono but once again, my dad was too tight with the dollars to pay the kimono rental fee. Major disappointed.

Then we went to the French Village. Could you believe that my dad actually forgot the camera?! I was yowling and in the end had to settle using handphones instead. The names of the shops there were in french but we knew what shops those were since they left their doors open for people to see the interior.

Rabbit park was nice. My sister wouldn't hold the rabbit my dad caught, so I had to hold it while my dad took pictures using his phone. It was surprisingly heavy. I had no idea that my dad was such an expert when it comes to catching bunny rabbits.

My favourite part was horseback ridding. At last! My dream came true! The woman in charge was instructing me how to mount up but before she could finish giving instructions, I was already on horseback on ready to hit the trails. My dad said that if he could afford it, he would let me learn Equestrian. Woah. I didn't know he had had such a thought.

We left after that. We were all jet lagged. Probably will suffer from knee aches soon since we had to climb those stupid slopes in order to get around those places. Still, it was fun. That was probably the only vacation I'll get this holiday.

Holiday Nightmare

I hate myself now. Really hate myself. Why do I have to be the one to get the blame for all the things that I didn't do?! Maybe it's just me, myself and I. Yesterday was simply a holiday nightmare.

Yesterday:
Got yelled at by mum at around 9 am
Faced a whole day with my yappy sickly sister
Found out that lunch is not included in my mum's yesterday to-do list
Was half dead by dinner time
Got barked at my currently-in-foul-mood sister
Naturally I barked back
And my mum just went berserk
Day ended with my sister jet lagged, my mum's mood improving cause of my dad & me being in my little emo corner

Apologies

I do want to apologise for all those capital letters I used in my posts. I am sure it doesn't seem very nice. It's just that I am always mad and I tend to capitalize the alphabeths when I am. This is the only way I can unleash my anger and fumes, via the keyboard. I just want to scream and scream and scream but that will land me into more trouble. So I don't really have much choice.

Sincere apologies for ranting out on you guys in school. Especially Nasuha, E Xuan, Vero and Angeline. You guys were brilliant and didn't even tell me off although I nearly always blab about my troubles to you. Sorry for being so blabby and annoying most of the time.

To Nasuha: Sorry sebab always nak cakap tentang problem saya kat kelas.
To E Xuan: 我每次都跟你谈我家里和我与朋友们之间的问题, 如果令你觉得烦恼的话, 真的很抱歉!
To Vero: Sorry ah, leng lui. Always bother you with nonsense and things unrelated to the topic.
To Angeline: Sorry for always bothering you with my problems and taking up so much of your time. I think I am starting to rely on you too much.

Watching the clock's hands move SLOWLY

bored...haven't really got anything to do. Okay, I do have that poem to write for tomorrow, but my mind is now...BLANK. Zero ideas, zero mood and zero feel. How do you expect me to write a poem when I don't even have the faintest idea of what freaking thing should I write about?

Looks like I have to use an old one. But I don't wanna do that, I wanna create a new one! Unfortunately, poem writing requires imagination and yearning, something which I do not have right now. God,WHY IN THE FREAKING WORLD DOES MY MIND HAVE TO GO-----AT THIS TIME?!

*crashes out after weeping
**whacking myself for having no imagination now when I need it
***starts bawling

My story character~Alice

Alice
I could not believe it when mum and dad split up when I was eight. I remember crying and begging for them to stay together. But now I knew that it was better this way. Mum can’t be happy with someone she doesn’t care enough for. Dad still cares for both of us, but as he says, he won’t ruin Mum’s live.
I remember being shocked when I heard Mum was getting married again. I didn’t want it at first because I wanted Mum and Dad back together again. Of course, it was pointless, but hey, a girl can dream right?
When I moved into the Hendersons’ and have to cope with a perfect stepsister, I thought I was never going to be happy like before. I had already single-handedly destroyed my school record by either failing or just merely passing my subjects since I was not into my studies. But Emily and Josh were great; they both love me and Mum.
At school, I was the remedial student. Miss Stacy taught me what I have missed during the ‘break-up’ year and helped me catch up with others my age. However, I couldn’t go back to classes with the rest for the teachers think that I might be able to do better with Miss Stacy.
I don’t have many friends in elementary school. No one wants to be friends with the remedial student. Only Brandon, his sister Stella and Emily are my friends, and since the latter is my sister, I don’t suppose she counts. Emily was a friend magnet-popular, pretty and smart. None of her friends care about me; they only treat me as invisible whenever I am around Emily. Their mouths only start working once Emily was out of ear shot for my stepsister wouldn’t hear of any insult being thrown at me.
My admission to SAH shocked many people, including me. No one would believe that I, the remedial girl would make it in. But I did, and I loved SAH. There, I learnt to shine and open up to people. I made super friends, something I don’t have before my years at SAH. I also learnt that no one can be perfect, only those who are willing to accept their own mistakes and weaknesses will ever improve. And I am proud to say that I have already taken my first step forward to improving.
Another thing I did not expect to find in SAH is: love. I never thought of finding someone I love and vice versa in my life. I mean, come on! I am obviously not as good as other kids my age, why would anyone in this world want ME? But Carter loves me and he thinks that I am a great rare star in this universe. Officially swooning now…
SAH is the place where it all began for me. My light only started to shine after I went there. For many of the students there, it is the same. To me, SAH is not just a school; it is a place where the dullest learn to shine. It’s the home of all students in it.

Why??

Why do grown ups always believe only in what they see, and not what they trust, regardless to whoever it may concern? Why do they think that because they spent more years than us, thus having more experience and knowledge, they are superior to us? Why are grown ups trusted, and yet we are being doubted every single minute every day? Why do grown ups rant on and on without even finding out the truth of their accusation? Why do grown ups have a certain freedom in life that we don't posses?



In other words, WHY ARE GROWN UPS TREATED INDIFFERENTLY THAN US??? Shouldn't EVERYBODY be treated the same? If our words are less trustable than those of grown ups, prove it. NO ONE can. Grown ups lie too, and their lies are more despicable than ours!

Bloggie Templet

HAHA....juz changed my blog templet...i originally wanted it to include Ashley Greene but the one with Ashley doesn't have Nikki Reed...so haiz...i chose Nikki Reed since it includes Jackson Rathbone. I won't mind, however, if there was no Robert and Kristin since i don't like them much. I WOULD like it if somebody tells me where i can find a templet with Ashley, Nikki and Jackson in it.

Still, LOVE TWILIGHT 4EVA!

I can't wait for Harry Potter 6 to come out...i wanna see Bonnie Wright snog Daniel Radcliff...no...kidding:p! But I DO wanna see Bonnie Wright...she's so pretty!

Poem I Created

Keep reaching for the stars,

Don't be afraid to fall.

Coz even if you do,

Someone will catch you.

Try and try again,

Until you finally shine.

I promised Alyea to post this. I created it myself. One of my favourite pastimes!

Kampar Pics of...ME!!!-and cousin(s)

Haha...me and my cousin Shirley...taken only last Sunday...in Kampar, Perak...my Grandmother's room...AHHHHHHH!!!! stupid Kelvin's legs are sprawled behind us...when did he get there?!!!!

Us again...it's a leeetle blur...my cousin and I don't exactly have the best picture-taking skill...Kelvin's leg is raised...wonder if he knows that his feet stinks....

We look kinda alike...don't we? We were supposed to be sleeping...but instead...we ended up taking mad pics...GOD!!! Kelvin Ng! Have some decency! No offense...but your feet TRULY have an 'appealing' stench

Can I Have This Dance~ HSM 3

haha...this is 1 of my fave songs in HSM 3...luuurvee it to the extends...waltz song...Can I Have This Dance sung by Zac and Vanessa

Take my hand, take a breath
Pull me close and take one step
Keep your eyes locked on mine,
And let the music be your guide.
Won`t you promise me
(now won`t you promise me, that you`ll never forget)
We`ll keep dancing (to keep dancing)
wherever we go next
It`s like catching lightning the chances of finding someone like you
It`s one in a million, the chances of feeling the way we do
And with every step together, we just keep on getting better
So can I have this dance (can I have this dance)
Can I have this dance

Oh no mountains too high enough, oceans too wide
`Cause together or not, our dance won`t stop
Let it rain, let it pour
What we have is worth fighting for
You know I believe, that we were meant to be
It`s like catching lightning the chances of finding someone like you (like you)
It`s one in a million, the chances of feeling the way we do (way we do)
And with every step together, we just keep on getting better
So can I have this dance (can I have this dance)
Can I have this dance
Can I have this dance
Can I have this dance

2nd part: Stanford 'prom'

Take my hand, I`ll take the lead
And every turn will be safe with me
Don`t be afraid, afraid to fall
You know I`ll catch you through it all
And you can`t keep us apart (even a thousand miles, can`t keep us apart)
`Cause my heart is (cause my heart is) wherever you are
It`s like catching lightning the chances of finding someone like you
It`s one in a million, the chances of feeling the way we do
And with every step together, we just keep on getting better
So can I have this dance (can I have this dance)
Can I have this dance

Happiness

It is vitally important for everyone to stay happy, as happiness brings a lot of good things in our life. Unfortunately, not everyone can stay that way all the time. Some even lost the will to be happy, thinking only about negative thoughts and how unfair life was to them. Therefore, here are some reasons why you SHOULD be happy:

1. By being happy, you bring a certain sunshine to others
2. You also feel positive about life
3. You will look more prettier/better-looking than being sad
4. Your heart will feel free
5. Good things will start happening to you
6. Laughter is always the best remedy for everything
7. Others will look up to you as someone tough and very optimistic

Die Hard Twilight Fan

Movie poster. Oooh, I remember when I first saw it...I can't seem to be patient enough to wait for it to launch.

Ah...from left: Nikki Reed as Rosalie, Jackson Rathbone as Jasper, Ashley Greene as Alice, Robert Pattinson as Edward and Kellen Lutz as Emmett

p.s. Nikki is also my sister's name

Edward, Bella, James, Victoria and Laurent

The Cullen family...Emmett, Rose, Esme, Edward, Carlisle, Alice and Jasper( my favourite male character)

Picture (2)

yup...once again from left: the mc, my Uncle 5, my cousin(2nd eldest), my uncle 4, my eldest cousin, and Michelle Ng( my cousin as well, in college)...aww...singing together! a cute, harmonious pic!

Same picture...but now u can see Shirley...god! Erwin's a SHORTIE!!!!!!! my lil sis blocked him!

Pictures (1)

Haha...picture of me and my cousin at my grandma's 71th birthday...look silly, don't we?

ah...yes...karaoke at my grandma's party...tribute to her from her grandkids:

from left: Kelvin Ng( form 2 this year), Erwin Ng( same as kelvin), Nikki Ng( me lil sis-upsr this year), Jacin Ng( same as my lil sis), Shirley Ng( same as the boys) and...ME!

Oh my!

tomorrow is an extremly busy day for me-which day isn't?-and i am not pleased. If my homework isn't completed before saturday, i am sooooo dead! Teachers, please, please, please don't be so cruel. I won't mind if you lighten the load on us. Oh, please, please, please!!!!

4 HOURS TRAVEL

OH my, Qing Ming is coming! This means that I will have to spend 4 hours in a car on my journey back to my dad's hometown. Thank goodness we'll be leaving at night, I won't have to suffer from intense heat waves from the sun. But I know it's not my dad's favourite time to travel, so there is a little hardship there. But we don't have a choice, he has to work in the day, and I won't skip my BC class-a promise to a friend-coz it is very expensive to put me through. Hope my cousins will be back too, or it'll be too lonely.

Secrets

If you have a secret, keep it. Don't ever tell unless you are ready. Secrets, they are meant to be kept, not told. Once it is out, it's no longer a secret.

Keeping 1 is hard enough, but if your friends are willing to help you lighten the load, and if you feel like you can trust them, DON'T REJECT. You need some1 to be there for you

Life...What is the Point?

My life:

Homework
School
Tuition
Getting yelled at
Study
Fight with my sister
Get yelled at again
I yell back
Fight with parents
And end up with my blanket over my silly head

Oh...the ridicule
So called my "LIFE"

STRESS TO THE POWER OF HUNDREDS

STRESS
STRESS
STRESS
STRESS

I am stressing like crazy! Hectic lifestyle much? Tuition is a complete waste of Form 3's precious time, and i think most I know will agree with me. I am dead confused, baffled, confunded, take your pick. OH GOD, tears are streaming down now. I am seriously breaking down...AGAIN! How many times have I broken down since January? Dunno, lost count.

WORST DAY EVER

WHAT THE FREAKING HECK DO I CARE ABOUT TSUN JIN AND KUAN CHENG'S SPM RESULT???????????? IT'S NOT LIKE I AM SUPER CONCERNED ABOUT IT. FOR HEAVEN'S SAKE, THEY DON'T CARE ABOUT OURS, WE DON'T CARE ABOUT THEIRS! IT'S THE COSMIC RULE FOR SCHOOLING KIDS, DUH!

at least for those who don't have any close friends taking SPM results this year anyway

anyway, guess what i want to say is: HEY, WHAT'S WITH YOU EVEN IF I APPEAR NOT TO GIVE A RAT'S REAR ABOUT THOSE OTHER SCHOOLS???????????????? NOT A CRIME, IS IT?

Form 3 with Standard 1-3

HELLO!!!!!!!! somebody had better tell me something...since WHEN form 3 students study about ARTICLES A, AN and THE???? Well, guess what? I did. For tuition. OMG...it was tres BAKA!!!! I'd rather be sleeping at home, playing chess with Zhou Gong...( don't ask me why, that's what they say) STUPID TUITION!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I wanna QUIT!!!! I HATE TUITION LIFE!!!!!!! I used to manage my school syllables without tuition for all through my school career, UNTIL my father obviously got a broken nerve that turned him from logical:- my daughther survived 7 and a half-years without tuition, surely she wouldn't need any now?- to: It's PMR time! If 1 of my daughthers can't manage, neither does the other!!!!!!!!! OH MY, SOMEBODY, KNOCK SOME BARKING SENSE INTO HIS HEAD OR MEND THAT BROKEN NERVE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Intervensi

I hate exams...i hate geo...never liked it...not even the teacher who teaches me...WHOSE STUPID IDEA IS IT TO PUT IT IN PMR?!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! anyway...congrats to Esther Tang...7A in intervensi...dont worry about BM...knowing you, you'll propably get straight As in PMR.

I cant believe you are taking Art next year, Esther...but still, do your best! Whatever desicion you make, i trust you'll make the right one.

Writing workshop

Omigosh! It was tres cool. I am soooo lucky to have the opportunity!!! I met up with Sarah Butler today and she taught me and 6 other people how to write stories! It was more of the creative writing type, you know, but it was still fab. i even got her autograph! I might post a couple of pics...if I've got the time that is. Made friends with a cute form 1 girl...name's Li Fei. She is sweet.

Worst day of my family

This day is definately the worst! My grandma, me and my sis got food poisoning...i feel so bad 4 missing school!!! Who knows what important stuff i might have missed! My dad ended up with fever and my mom is having a really tiring day...i can tell coz she is yelling at me for no reason...I got tuition later and i HATE it!!!Tuition when i am sick, and not to mention i've got a REALLY perverted teacher...URGH!!!!!!!!This day had better not get any worst!(though i won't mind if i am sick enough to skip t-u-i-t-i-o-n...haha)

To: Yvonne

i dun even understand a thing...it's reasonable to miss 2C but c'mon...dont be such a crybaby...u've got plenty of frens with u in 3B...dont u? of course...assuming that i fit in the equation...haha

SCHOOL

ooooh!!!! 2nd week of it and i m bored out of my...well... there is lots of homework AND reserches to make...URGH!!!!! what with tuition and everything...i suspect i'll become nuts before June...hopefully not!!!(horror!)